Thu, Aug. 5th, 2010, 07:09 am
In these troubled times, one must only speak one's thoughts in the most private places, the deepest, darkest corners of your life where no one can pick up your discarded words and use them against you in a court of law. Which begs the question...why do we use this freaking site?
BECAUSE supposedly it's a way of keeping in touch with people.
I have lapsed in this duty. Many apologies for barely being on here at all this past year. You must have missed my incredibly insightful comments, like "haha yeah" and "oh man that sucks," or the ever welcome "me too!"
Long story short, hello people YOU'RE PRETTY
Sat, Aug. 1st, 2009, 11:24 pm
When we last met our hero, he had obtained a girlfriend.
That lasted for three days. She "got confused." Long story. A story that ends with us being friends, but she's moving in on my block, and we're in the same acting classes, and we're both on the student theatre board, and we're still hella good friends. This is at the same time absolute shit and fucking awesome. You understand.
Now, I am in Seattle for two weeks for various reasons, and am quite, quite tired of heat.
Anyone else in town that wishes to see me/catch up with me/make love to me? Probably not that last one? Especially if you're a guy?
I'm tired, and frustrated. I'm away from my music for two weeks...and I was just writing something awesome, too...BOOOO.
For anyone who still reads this - I miss you. Even if you're one of the random friends I have from the old Hey Arnold! boards, or if you don't even like me anymore/ever/at all.
I'll be 21 in 14 days. Two weeks, man. That's weird.
Mon, May. 25th, 2009, 12:54 pm
Once upon a time, Andy said "Fuck you, life! I'm'a'kick you in the teeth!"
And then he did.
And then life, which was now missing a few teeth, grudgingly handed Andy a girlfriend. And then it cried and ran away.
Thu, May. 21st, 2009, 07:30 pm
-Life is dumb.
-Lost is amazing, almost caught up.
-Auditions come up WAY too quickly
-I don't like filling out scholarship paperwork
-Doubt is a fabulous play, hopefully directing it this fall
-I'm the secretary of our student theatre company now
-I'm taking way too many classes, which means TOO MANY FINALS
-Girl issues still there - cause she's still incredible, and probably still not interested.
-Did I mention that life is dumb?
Fri, May. 1st, 2009, 01:33 am
Isn't sure how he feels right now....
It's definitely like middle school all over again. I didn't have the balls to say anything when we hung out ALL DAY, and then got frustrated with myself after she left, and sent her a text. A TEXT. It didn't say anything specific...but it probably said enough for her to get the point. I've all but jumped off my cliff.
I can't even form cohesive thoughts. I have homework due tomorrow, and a test, and I'm ill-prepared for everything. I feel that way a lot lately.
Fuck me but I'm frightened
Wed, Apr. 29th, 2009, 06:35 pm
I haven't written anything here in a while.
I had the urge to write something, but the urge is gone. Oh, wait, there it is again.
I'm experiencing that strange malady of of the male sex...my mood every day is completely and unknowingly dictated by a certain female's attentions. Today was a good day. Tomorrow will be better.
I haven't told her. I'm a bit scared to. More than a bit.
Haven't been this invested in anyone since....well, since last time, which was from 7th-12th grade. So, it's scary. And wonderful. And horrible. And makes me want to throw up.
Does one take the plunge, or sit in silence for a more definite signal? Does every day I wait push me further into friend zone?
I wish I was more practiced at this. But I don't get this attached easily or often.
Just wanted to throw my frustration out at the world. Or the two/three people who will even still see my posts.
Tue, Aug. 5th, 2008, 12:27 pm
It's certainly been a while.
Most of the people who I used to read on this thing don't post anymore.
Being home has been really bittersweet.
Most of the friends I've seen have been ones from college. I had to leave the city to see them. I can count on one hand the people I really want to see that are in Seattle. I've seen four of them. As things go, I probably won't see the fifth.
I seriously can't wait to go home. Strange how Bellingham is home now.
At least I'm getting paid - redesigning the Washington State Thespian Society
website. Go to the link, you'll see why. I'm making it somewhere on the order of 30 to 500 times sexier.
I go home on Aug 16th or so, that's a day after my birthday. Classes don't start until Sept 20-somethingth, but I'm the lead in a local Bellingham production of the musical The Mystery of Edwin Drood, and rehearsals start pretty early. So if anyone who still reads this actually cares to see me, you've got about two weeks tops.
Mon, Jan. 21st, 2008, 04:10 am
LIFE IS GOOD i suppose.
I'm working out now (gasp), so that's something.
Still working on the whole "eating better" bullshit. Hah.
The opera is actually starting to begin to think about possibly becoming a real show in the near future, which is nice.
I got my TV finally, since I forgot it when I moved back up here to b-ham....mom/dad had to drive it up today....
The girl I was interested in did not come back to WWU this quarter, and will be instead applying to some arts school down in california. So, fuck. At least I don't have to be attracted to a girl with a boyfriend anymore.
I'm staying up awful late...case in point, it's 4:13 right now.....
I wish I could say that I miss everyone back home, but I don't. Only some people. Likely, I only miss the ones who can read this message. What I really wish is that I'd gotten to spend more time with you, Chelsea, and Caitlin, and Claire, and I didn't even get to SEE Katy or even Bonnie...and I wanted to see more of Isabelle and Brendan and Max, etc. Breaks aren't long enough.
But still...I've got my boys up here. And that's pretty good, to say the least.
Sat, Dec. 1st, 2007, 03:05 am
Not much is going on. Here's another patented bulleted list, things that are on my mind today.
- I have an abnormally large list of things to do before finals. They require lots of time. This time...it is mythical. I believe that the mere suggestion of said time would cause my brain to fold in upon itself. This is an exaggeration - I played about four hours of Mass Effect today.
- It is uncomfortably apparent to me how much I miss love, and the giddy, disgusting, makes-you-want-to-puke, amazing, frightening, agonizing excitement that comes with it. I miss...femininity. I have lots of friends that are girls. I frequently hug them. Dear god it's nowhere near enough. WHERE on earth is there a girl who could put up with my weirdness, my overly homo-erotic gestures, my theatre-major-ness, my obsessions, and yet is not incredibly difficult to look at and/or a raging pothead and/or an absolute bitch?
- I drink waaaaaaay too much pop/soda/sodapop/lolly-water (as my aunt calls it)
- My roommate is the coolest roommate ever to exist. I love him to death. If I were gay, or a woman, he would HELLA be my crush. Weird statement? Yes. True? Yes. He's that awesome though.
- People can be so incredibly blatant about the fact that they don't give a shit about you, that if possible it becomes even MORE insulting.
- Have you ever thought about how much of our money goes into vending machines? And where that money goes?
- I hate it when I psychoanalyze myself. Cause the second I start second-guessing my own thoughts, I become unsure of what I'm thinking in the first place. (second place who? what? where? how? who had the other bean? the other bean! the other bean? you pocketed the other bean! I didn't!! - yes I did...)(Sorry, musical moment)(Into the Woods, for the non-nerds)
- Piano is my safe place. I can do anything, I can ignore everyone, I can feel everything when I'm sitting at a piano. Every piano is different. I feel like...I feel like I could write better if I kept switching pianos. Each one would add something different...I'm odd.
- It's 3:17 AM and I don't give a shit.
Sun, Oct. 28th, 2007, 11:02 pm
So, life is really stupid.
Alright, my entire week has been fucking bizarre. Everything from things happening with friends to frustrations to homework to emotional conversations that were long overdue to women issues to back pain to stress to loss of sleep to WHATEVER.
First off, rehearsal is a joke. Like, I KNOW that my entire blocking for the show is sit, stand, sit, turn, stand, sit, stand, talk (omg!), sit, talk (omg!), stand, stand, stand, stand, sleep, die, go to hell. But to have to rehearse that EVERY DAY is absolutely stupid. But at the same time, it's NOT stupid, as Kyle points out, because we DO have to get used to the mind-numbingly dull process because that IS our part in the show. It's just fucking insane. Add to that the fact that the girl who I am increasingly more and more interested in is in my direct line of vision for the entire show means I can barely concentrate on the story to keep myself interested. I'll be like "Huh, Colin Powell is talking to George oh my god she is so fucking cute I can't even stand it I just ARGH" and then my back starts hurting because I forgot to stretch out before rehearsal because I was spending six hours today transposing a song into a higher key for a friend in my musical theatre class who I've only asked $20 dollars from and was working on it LITERALLY until I left for dinner which was RIGHT before rehearsal.....Shit is just stupid.
Plus, I have this project due thursday that I haven't started on basically, a song I have to give a final performance of in musical theatre on tuesday that I need to nail down the blocking for, japanese homework that sits on my desk mocking me with all its inane repetitions, an ENTIRE OPERA SCORE that I have to look through and learn notes/rhythms of by Tuesday as well, a test coming up in O Chem that I don't know shit for cause I've been losing sleep and skipping at least once a week.....
This is getting out of hand. I really just want a) all the homework to miraculously become 10 times easier to finish, b) all the days to get a few more hours in them, c) the girl to be like "oh, hey, Andy's kind of a cool guy I'd like to get to know a bit more." and d) the resolve to just sit down and do all the shit I need to do instead of typing out a rant about it on LJ to procrastinate.
That is all.